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Truth

On this week's Keepin It Real, Cam has found infinite inspiration for commentaries for years and years to come.

I sat quietly this morning and was ready to admit it’s time to quit Keepin’ It Real. I’ve lost my creativity. My energy around writing insightful and truthful things about the world around me was gone. Seven – maybe eight – years is a pretty good run. Maybe close to 350 or more original pieces – I should be proud of my work and unashamed to put these commentaries to bed. But then…

Scrolling through today’s headlines, I spotted a lifeline. Something that will allow me countless weeks of effortless content. It was hard to believe it was true, but… there it was.

Mark Zuckerberg was turning off the fact checking on his social media platforms. No longer would Facebook and Instagram work to fact-check people’s posts. They’d let the community of users do it instead. The article went on to say it was his way of genuflecting to the Cheeto Jesus – our upcoming, return of the king, Commander in Chief. Trump dislikes facts and accuracy, so Zuckerberg, to curry favor with him, was ending any reliance on it in his giant megaphone of social media. Wow! If the age of Enlightenment wasn’t already dead, it is dead, dead, dead now.

So, with that, I’m redoing my biography. You may know me as a commentator for Alabama Public Radio who lives in Mobile married with four teenaged children. That was who I was during the days when truth mattered. Now I’m a world-famous commentator who offers sage wisdom and insight and has been feted by the Nobel Prize committees and has turned down Pulitzer Prizes because they weren’t prestigious enough. Sounds good. My four children are the best kids in any environment they ever enter – academics, athletics, needlepoint – you name it. They’re the best out of everyone. My previous work was as an astronaut, but it bored me, a lion tamer, but the smell of the lions got to me, and, of course out of tribute to George Costanza, I am both an architect and a marine biologist. I’ve built a woodshed once and tossed a fish back into the Gulf, which in this era of non-truth, is sufficient enough to give myself those titles regardless of what anyone says because those people are jealous liars who are out to get me.

My resume and my CV will change by this afternoon and will include the words Adonis, Guggenheim and National Book Award. I’ll call the bank and tell them the balance I see online isn’t correct. My truth says it is much higher, and they better change it, or I’ll sue because the bank has a personal vendetta against me.

And my truth says that it’s not the Gulf of Mexico or the Gulf of America. It’s the Gulf of Cam. It, in fact, has always been.

Tell me that’s not true. I dare you.

I’m Cam Marston, and I’m just trying to keep it real.

Cam Marston is the Keepin' It Real host for Alabama Public Radio.